So I'm at work.

So I'm at work and I'm busy as hell. Well not so busy as to where I couldn't write this. I'm getting scared recently about my job security. I don't feel like I'm doing that well at doing things around here. I'm trying my goddamnedest to balance all this shit happening and it's just never enough. I have overbookings left and right, and I think corporate or some other online site is changing our rack reports (report of how many rooms total we have.) And that's going to have an effect on us until September. I have to get breakfast up here everymorning. I have to beg and plead with my boss to pay me what I have taken out of my own pocket to the things we need up here. I don't get anything for driving back and forth, and if I'm a doughnut short for some fat fucker that wants another dough nust EVEN THOUGH HE'LL EAT HALF AND THROW IT AWAY, I still get the blame for not having enough breakfast. I have phone calls every minute asking if we have rooms for the weekend that starts tomorrow. They can't hear me say "Knights Inn this is David how can I help you." They always have to ask what this place is...they wonder if they have called Knights Inn. Yes you did you stupid fucking prick. No I do not have rooms for tomorrow. Then they act surprised. "Why ain'tchu gots no rooms? What goin' on dat so special in towns?" Well it 's fucking summer time, the busy season, you know, just like at McDonald's during lunch time. So you waste about 20 seconds of my life each time asking me this, when if you could take that 20 second out of YOUR OWN TIME and THINK about it. Writing this far I have recieved 7 phone calls. 4 asking if I have rooms for tonight tomorrow and Saturday, 2 for reservations on a good date, another phone call about a cancelation email she just got dated for '07, and 1 just asking info on the hotel. I move people from room to room, I get in trouble...ooo. I try to make everyone happy up here, doesn't work. Maids are fighting amongst each other. It just sucks royally up here. I just really want to scream everytime the phone rings. I had dreams last week about overbookings running through my head...all I saw were DD1 and K11 running circles around each other everytime I closed my eyes to sleep. The stress is getting to me and I'm about to explode. I'm in the negative and have checks bouncing because of this fucking stupid breakfast I have to pick up or these fat assholes that stay up here. I'm to the point where I'm going to take money out of the cash register if they want me to get breakfast. I've fucking had it. Year before last we got a xmas bonus, this year we got nothing, and maybe the coming up xmas will be the same. I always hated when they would tease you with a bonus and never deliver. It just fucking sucks. And I feel like I can't tell anyone so I might as well just type it for all you other fuckers to read. It just really sucks. I feel trapped and I know I am. I'm paid enough to keep my house and pay my bills. I get about $30 a month to myself, and $8 goes to xbox live every month. Yeah I know I can save money by getting the 12 month subscrip. But when you can barely skim by every fucking day, I doubt you can save enough to get that. I haven't bought ammo for my S&W in about a year. I have the same 16 hollow points, 14 in the clip, one in the chamber, and one at home. It's getting fucking shitty. Every second longer I sped in this place keep driving me closer and closer to going fucking nuts. Every day I go home I look at my house and thank whatever fucking higher power is there. I take pride in my home but I can't keep it up (ha ha) I get called all night about questions from work, I get called in the morning about paperwork, then when I get here I deal with the job for 10 hours EVERY DAY. I'm just sick of the fucking shit. My boss drives through here and they could easily sell their other prop for 5 million. They could just take the money and split town. I don't know why they stick around, I'm just glad I can pay for my house. But everytime I look at my place, I'm just happy to know what I can do with it...and I try whenever I have any energy left. I don't have any time to myself anymore, unless I stay up late and make the wife pissed off that I'm on live until 1-2 in the morning. But it's the only tiome I can get my own space. She comes home and kicks it in the room for about an hour or more. She reads comes in cooks dinner, talks to the kids, gets some laundry done, but she gets alone time. She can take a lunch break in the middle of the day and be away from work. But she just doesn't seem to understand, I want to go out sometime. I haven't been out drinking with friends since, 2006. We're getting a minivan...it's a 2002 Windstar. $500, needs trannie work. So after it's in the shop for the past month we're about to take it over for about $2495. Luckily she's getting it through the car lot at a great monthly payment price. But we've been planning for this and basically we're cutting out night out dinner to get it (which usually involved pizza, taco bell, wendy's, or some other cheap place.) Well I can't think of anything else to vent/bitch about on here. So please tell me if I need help or what. I don't have insurance which is another topic all it's own, and even if I did would they cover fucking going insane?