TheFlame's Blog - 2old2play

Life on the Hamster Wheel

Long time, no blog Things are much the same here. Dh works, he games, he hangs out with us. Dd will be starting jr high this fall, so we are navigating all the preteen stuff that I was SO not looking forward to. But she's got a good head on her shoulders...so far. Ds is trying to speak more. He seems to improve in miniscule increments and you really have to step back to see it sometimes. His autism has robbed him of his speech, but he's so wonderful in so ways.

I don't know if its being in my 30s, or if its just life, but I don't know what I'm supposed to do sometimes. I know I need to be there 100 percent for ds for him to progress. But how do I do that and work so that we can pay some of our debt down? I know I should keep house better, but how?? How do I split myself into all these pieces? Wife. Mother. Teacher. Bill payer. Housekeeper. Therapist. Taxi. and the list goes on.

I think I'm going to end up with mulitple personality disorder....or curled up in a ball sucking my thumb!

Oh well, such is life. Que sera' sera', right?

But sometimes I do feel like the hamster on the wheel.

I hope all of you are doing well and enjoying your gaming I know it provides a much needed escape valve for my dh

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A Touching Story of Fall and HALO THREE BAYBEE!!!!!

I spend sooo much time worrying about bills and the housework and such, that sometimes I forget to STOP and ENJOY my children.

It was a perfect fall evening. My hubby and daughter were curled up on the couch watching football, eating the stew I made. My son was running around playing, happy as can be. The house was warm and cozy. We were all settling in for the evening.

Then some guys from hubby's work showed up to get him. They were in uniform. (He's a cop) He forgot a training that he had this evening. So, he quickly got dressed and left with apologies. I was feeling a little down.

My son ran and jumped on his beanbag bed and said "Gooodnight.." That means he wants me to lay down with him and snuggle So I lay down on the beanbag bed and he was putting his forehead to mine and I sang to him. My daughter ran in and jumped in and I sang to her too, even though she's 11. For a few minutes we all just lay there and watched the yellow-leaved tree out his window waving back and forth in the wind. It was so nice.

Then she tickled my son and he started laughing and I tickled the both of them and we started wrestling and leaping around and my son leaped on my back and "tackled" me!! We were laughing so hard I lost my breath and it was wonderful.

Then we rested and my son got thirsty and ran out of the room and it was over. But for a bit there it was just a perfect. snapshot. moment. It was one of those things that makes me so incredibly grateful to be a mother, to be given the gift of my children. I have wonderful, loving, beautiful children.

I thank God that I had that perfect moment today with them.

Ok, enough of that....about HALO THREE!!

My hubby works THREE jobs. He has not had enough one on one time with our daughter lately. Its easier for him to spend one on one time with our son because my son has autism and my son loves to wrestle and go run errands with Daddy and things like that. Now, my daughter enjoys these things too, but being eleven and bored easily as an average tween, she wants to do an ACTIVITY with Daddy!

I let my daughter miss school so she could travel to our nearest big town here with her Daddy to the midnight release of Halo Three. I don't even allow her to play it, but she travelled with him....they hung out at the mall...ate Chinese food...took some of those goofy booth pictures (pretending to pick their noses *sigh*)...and had a blast! She was exhausted by the time they were standing in line for the game (prepaid by hubby of course - Limited Edition) with over 150 (approx. according to hubby) other people, but she was excited to be there with Daddy. He got his game and they travelled the two and a half hours to come home. I found her the next morning still in her clothes asleep on the couch. Hubby said that's as far as she made it and he didn't see the harm in leaving her there.

She gets As in school. She wants to be an Ecologist (and she's only ELEVEN) when she grows up. I know she understands this is not something I'd normally approve of and that this was special, but I still feel a little guilty for allowing her to miss school without being sick.....until I look at those pictures. Then I know I did the right thing

HALO SIDE NOTE: The graphics rock!! Hubby's every waking hour has been spent playing of course!! He even took some days off he had saved up so he could spend some time playing it. But he deserves it because he works dang hard and after all....they're PAID days off!

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Holding Pattern

I have nothing of interest to report. Nothing that would hold your attention. I am currently in a holding pattern. I get up. I get the kids ready. I send them off to school. I get ready. I go to work. I pickup the carpool kids. I drop them off. My son comes home on the special needs bus. I focus on him and trying to get my daughter to get homework done and such. Then if I'm lucky and hubby's not working, I see him and mess around on the computer for a bit. Go to bed. Rinse and Repeat. Pete and Re-pete.

So, now for you, I will do a dance.

*dancing in front of my computer...climbing up on my chair and doing a dance...climbing back down and dancing around....sitting back down*

There. I hope that was as entertaining for you as it was for me.

I need sleep.

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sigh

I'm feeling depressed today. Depressed and hormonal. I need chocolate. PMS sucks.

That is all.

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A Fresh Start

Why are beginnings so exciting?? Especially when it is the beginning of something you've already done before so that you ultimately know how it is going to work out??

Tomorrow is the first day of school. My daughter is SO excited. She is beginning sixth grade - the last day of elementary school. And it will be exciting for awhile. She'll see her friends again...she'll get to study Science (her FAVE subject!)...

And then fall weather...Halloween...first snow...Thanksgiving...Christmas and Mimi (my Mom) comes to visit...

But, by January the new has totally worn off of school. For me too. The new has worn off of the cold weather too by February. Enough is enough already. We're from the South and moved to North Dakota, so it seems utterly UNNATURAL still to me (even after about 8 yrs being here) for there to be SNOW still around in MARCH!!!

There will come a time, the new will wear off and we'll all be complaining about desperately wanting summer. May will come and we'll ecstatically shed our winter coats and tentatively expose ourselves to the sun and begin the summer rituals of swimming, camping, fishing, backyard barbeques....

BUT..BUT...

Sure enough, come August we'll all be aflutter around here about the new school year. Even knowing that soon it will get old. Even knowing that it won't be long before we are longing for it to be over...wanting to move on to the next thing...

Is it just human nature?

Things that make you go "hmmmm..."

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Today was my Anniversary!

Today was my anniversary. We've been married a long time and I'm glad. Today we had nothing special planned. He slept in most of the day because even on his days off he keeps night shift hours and he was up late playing Halo and such. Today he called my cellphone and sang "Happy Anniversary!" on my voicemail. I bought him a goofy card. We took the kids to a park and sat on the swings and talked about our dreams while we watched our children and a friend play. It was nice and we hadn't done that in a while. He even climbed a little with the kids...swung a little... and then we drove thru Dairy Queen for supper! *L* He's awesome. I love him very much. And yes, I'm being incredibly sentimental. So, sue me!

We've been thru a lot of hell together. I don't know how much he wants me to share about all of that. But I couldn't have asked for a better partner..a better friend..a better husband

Ok..sap over...back to your regularly scheduled programming....

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Games People Play

We're all game players really, aren't we? I mean, you play the game in life to get by...you smile and nod...you dress up..but your best foot forward...wash behind your ears...*L* (*L* means laughing...just wanted to point that out in case it doesn't mean that here)

My point is that very few people in our lives will really get who we are. I mean who sees us in all our ugly honesty? Grumpy and shuffling...torn sweats and baggy, holey shirt...snappy attitude...a little ripe from the day...

Our parents, siblings, spouses, and kids pretty much...right? Why is it those we love the most get the worst of us? I am not aging all that wonderfully. Something weird is going on with my skin now that I'm in my mid 30s. I've gained weight.

And why are we "2old2play?" I think you're never too old to play! *L*

Just putting that out there.....

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Gamer Widow

I am not a gamer, but I'm married to one - does that count?

I am not, regardless of the title, a gamer widow. I understand my husband's need for gaming. Things can be rough sometimes and we all need an escape. I originally joined here to hit on my husband via his blog. He told me I oughta blog and I said nah. But now I find I need it, so here I am!

I hope you don't find my blogs too boring. Right now, my husband is showing my brother how you can play "classic" games on the X-box. They're playing "Double Dragon." I can't believe that game is about 20 years old. I was an Astroids champion in my day!!

Man, I feel old looking at the very simplistic graphics on the game. I remember when Pac Man was da bomb.

Ok, somebody better leave me a comment dangit or I'll feel unwelcome!!

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