Wigman

Name: Wigman
Joined On: Mar 09, 2006
Maintag: SRBER , W1GMAN
Age: 34
Occupation: Technician
Location: CT
Currently: Offline
Last seen: 11/14/08

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11/16/07

Thats How!

I rear-ended a car this morning.

So there we are on the side of the road and slowly the other driver gets out of the car . . . and you know how you just-get-sooo-stressed and you know how I get at times, so.......

Well, I could NOT believe my eyes . . he was a DWARF!

But his attitude sucked and he storms over to my car, looks up at me and says,

"I AM NOT HAPPY!"

I could not help myself, I looked down at him and simply said,

"Well, which one are you then?". . . and that's when the fight started!

Later!

Posted by Wigman @ 10:31 am EDT | Permalink | 8 Comments

11/15/07

Good Morning

Just sayin whats up and few short funnies to start the day. Later!!

Retired

Working people frequently ask retired people what they do to make their days interesting.

Well, for example, the other day my wife and I went into town and went into a shop.

We were only in here for about 5 minutes.

When we came out, there was a cop writing out a parking ticket. We went up to him and said,

"Come on man, how about giving a senior citizen a break?"

He ignored us and continued writing the ticket.

I called him a Nazi turd.

He glared at me and started writing another ticket for having worn tires.

So my wife called him a Shithead.

He finished the second ticket and
put it on the windshield with the first.

Then he started writing a third ticket.

This went on for about 20 minutes.

The more we abused him, the more tickets he wrote.

Personally, we didn't care. We came into town by bus.

We try to have a little fun each day now that we're retired.

It's important at our age

Fishing in bad weather

I got up early, put on my long johns, dressed quietly, made my lunch, grabbed the dog, slipped quietly into the garage to hook the boat up to the truck, and proceeded to back out into a torrential downpour. There was snow mixed with the rain, and the wind was blowing 50 mph. I pulled back into the garage, turned on the radio, and discovered that the weather would be bad throughout the day. I went back into the house, quietly undressed, and slipped back into bed. There I cuddled up to my wife's back, now with a different anticipation, and whispered, 'The weather out there is terrible.' My loving wife of twenty years replied, 'Can you believe my stupid husband is out fishing in that crap?'

I still don't know if she was joking...

Posted by Wigman @ 9:52 am EDT | Permalink | 0 Comments

10/31/07

Aches and Pains

Man I know im getting older but I still refuse to listen to my body telling me so.the funny thing is I can go run a fullcourt game of hoops with the local kids and have some of their little smartasses winded "old guy who you callin old punk" and feel fine the next day.but the last few nights I been kickin it in guitar hero trying to get some time in and learn those songs and I do mean trying and I get off cramped to all hell. fret button shoulder feels like I feel asleep with my arm above my head (anybody thats ever done that knows what I mean) strum arm not as bad but stiff and my lower back like I had 100 extra pounds sitting on it . man this is the first game that has actually made me feel this way and it is either just the posion that it puts you in and im not used to it or im getting old.. ah must be the game

Later!

Posted by Wigman @ 11:04 am EDT | Permalink | 2 Comments

09/28/07

Just some funnies

#1
My flight was being served by an obviously gay flight attendant, who seemed

to put everyone in a good mood as he served us food and drinks.

As the plane prepared to descend, he came swishing down the aisle and told us that
"Captain Marvey has asked me to announce that he'll be landing the big
scary plane shortly, so lovely people, if you could just put your trays up,
that would be super."

On his trip back up the aisle, he noticed this well-dressed and rather

Arabic looking woman hadn't moved a muscle.

"Perhaps you didn't hear me over those big brute engines but I asked you to
raise your trazy-poo, so the main man can pitty-pat us on the ground."

She calmly turned her head and said, "In my country, I am called a Princess and I take orders from no one."

To which (I swear) the flight attendant replied, without missing a beat,
"Well, sweet-cheeks, in my country I'm called a Queen, so I outrank you.
Tray-up, Bitch."

#2

Four men were bragging about how smart their cats were.

The first man was an Engineer, the second man was an Accountant,the third man was a Chemist,,,, and the fourth man was a Government Employee.

To show off, the Engineer called his cat,

"T-square, do your stuff."

T-square pranced over to the desk, took out some paper and pen and promptly drew a circle, a square, and a triangle. Everyone agreed that was pretty smart.

But the Accountant said his cat could do better.

He called his cat and said,

"Spreadsheet, do your stuff."

Spreadsheet went out to the kitchen and returned with a dozen cookies. He divided them into 4 equal piles of 3 cookies. Everyone agreed that was good.

But the Chemist said his cat could do better. He called his cat and said,

"Measure, do your stuff."

Measure got up, walked to the fridge, took out a quart of milk, got a 10 ounce glass from the cupboard and poured exactly 8 ounces without spilling a drop into the glass.

Everyone agreed that was pretty good.

Then the three men turned to the Government Employee and said, "What can your cat do?"

The Government Employee called his cat and said,

"CoffeeBreak, do your stuff."

CoffeeBreak jumped to his feet, ate the cookies, drank the milk, sh*t on the paper, screwed the other three cats, claimed he injured his back while doing so, filed a grievance report for unsafe working conditions, put in for Workers Compensation and went home for the rest of the day on sick leave.

AND THAT'S WHY I WANT TO WORK FOR THE GOVERNMENT

Have a good weekend !!! Later

Posted by Wigman @ 3:55 pm EDT | Permalink | 4 Comments

09/13/07

New Skin

Well with Halo3 on its way it was time to get the equipment ready...well not really I just couldnt pass up this skin it was just too cool!!! this skin would look sick on an elite because there would be no white showing at all and just a nice dark background.