MTK Style Rant

Have you ever seen those comercials for the "More Taste League" by Miller Lite? That damn commissioner pisses me off. So the guy is in the bar and orders a Miller Light. The bartender(who is the comish in disguise) proceeds to tell the guy "Oh I'm sorry, we're all out of Miller Lite" and when the guy asks for any other lite beer he gets in trouble for it?!?!?!?!?

So you tell the dude you're out of the beer that he wants to drink which is the beer you say he should drink and then make him beg for leinency because he didn't order Miller Lite..... Fuck you buddy

Posted by YEM @ 10:48 am EDT | Permalink | 5 Comments

There Goes The Neighborhood....

 

"It is our duty to inform you that as of 7:35:05am UTC on September 10, 2008, the Earth has been destroyed.
The destruction of Earth was first reported by Mr Jonathan Barber of Wisconsin, United States, who spotted that his home-made seismic Earth Detector had ceased to give readings at around 8:00am (2am local time). Several other amateur geocide spotters noticed this at the same time but Mr. Barber was the first to place a telephone call to the IEDAB's Geocide Hotline (+44 115 09Ω 4127, ask for Other Dave) at which point IEDAB officials performed an emergency check of their own instrumentation and verified Mr. Barber's report, as well as fixing the exact time of geocide.

Evidence is still being collated, but preliminary results suggest that the Earth was destroyed pre-emptively by scientists at the Large Hadron Collider at CERN, Geneva, Switzerland, before the commencement of their experiments to locate the Higgs Boson, as a precautionary measure to ensure that the experiment itself could not result in the destruction of the Earth."

The Earth Has Been Destroyed, What Do I Do?

Don't Panic.

If you took the advice in our leaflet, "Preparing For Geocide", you will have made arrangements for this eventuality by preparing a Geocide Refuge either on a space station, ark ship, or other Earth-like planet. If you have done this, now is the time to make your way to your refuge. Do not stop to collect belongings, pets, or sentimental souvenirs of Earth, such as rocks.

If you have not prepared a Geocide Refuge and your local governing body has not created one for you, your best bet is to signal for help using a walkie-talkie or cellular telephone. Possibly a passing extraterrestrial will rescue you.

My Baby's In There!

Your baby has most likely been destroyed.

The Earth Hasen't Been Destroyed! What Are You Talking About?

Some of you will find it tougher to let go than others. There will be counselling sessions running on Pluto starting in mid-April. The first is at 7:15pm on Thursday 18th. BYOO2.

qntm.org/

Posted by YEM @ 3:48 pm EDT | Permalink | 3 Comments

Seamless Pictures

Posted by YEM @ 3:52 pm EDT | Permalink | 6 Comments

The Lamp is a lie

Remember this picture?




Yes it really was what you thought it was.....




Sand Crabs?


I swear its a candle


Twins?


Teh Joker


Posted by YEM @ 10:11 am EDT | Permalink | 0 Comments

Colt 45 B.C.

In ancient Egypt, beer was legal tender. The minimum wage for a day's work was two jars, each several gallons in size. The pharaohs collected jars as taxes and tributes.

Anheuser-Busch wasn't the first to use boobs to sell beer. In ancient Sumner -- aka modern-day Iraq -- images of topless barmaids were carved into the walls of beer shops to attract drinkers.

The Putumayo River tribes of the Amazon would eat captives only after an eight day beer festival.

After battle, Vikings drank ale from the boiled skulls of their enemies. Also, any pledge or statement made while drunk was considered legally binding.

Alulu Tablet - a receipt for "best" beer from 2050 BC in the ancient Kingdom of Ur


Posted by YEM @ 9:40 am EDT | Permalink | 3 Comments