Aw Hell! One More Joke.

A Texas cowboy walked into a drug store and asked to talk to a male
pharmacist. The elderly woman he was talking to said that she was the
pharmacist, and as she and her also widowed elderly sister owned the store,
there were no males employed there. She then asked if she could help the
gentleman.

The cowpoke said that it was something that he would be much more
comfortable discussing with a male pharmacist. The female pharmacist assured
him that she was completely professional and whatever it was that he needed
to discuss, he could be confident that she would treat him with the highest
level of professionalism.

The old bronco-buster agreed and began by saying, "This is tough for me to
discuss, but I have a permanent erection. It causes me a lot of problems and
severe embarrassment, and I was wondering what you could give me for it.

The pharmacist said, "Just a minute, I'll go talk to my sister." When she
returned, she said, "We discussed it at length and the absolute best we can
do is, 1/3 ownership in the store, a company car, and $3,000 a month plus
living expenses.

Posted by ripend_turmoil @ 11:43 am EDT | Permalink | 4 Comments

I GOT ONE!

After reading Jeep's blog yesterday...I figured I'd sling one out there.

Two Texas farmers, Jim and Bob, are sitting at their favorite bar, drinking beer.

Jim turns to Bob and says, "You know, I'm tired of going through life without an

 education. Tomorrow I think I'll go to the community college and sign up for

 some classes."

Bob thinks it's a good idea, and the two leave. The next day, Jim goes down to

 the college and meets the Dean of Admissions, who signs him up for the four

basic classes: math, English, history, and logic.

"Logic?" Jim says. "What's that?"

The Dean says, "I'll give you an example. Do you own a weed eater?"

"Yeah."

"Then logically speaking, because you own a weed eater, I think that you would

 have a yard."

"That's true, I do have a yard."

"I'm not done," the Dean says. "Because you have a yard, I think logically that

 you would have a house."

"Yes, I do have a house."

"And because you have a house, I think that you might logically have a family."

"Yes, I have a family."

"I'm not done yet. Because you have a family, then logically you must have a

wife. And because you have a wife, then logic tells me you must be a

heterosexual."

"I am a heterosexual. That's amazing; you were able to find out all of that

because I have a weed eater."

Excited to take the class now, Jim shakes the Dean's hand and leaves to go

meet Bob at the bar. He tells Bob about his classes, how he is signed up for

 Math, English, History, and Logic.

"Logic?" Bob says, "What's that?"

Jim says, "I'll give you an example. Do you have a weed eater?"

"No."

"Then you're a queer." 

Posted by ripend_turmoil @ 11:03 am EDT | Permalink | 5 Comments

THINK YOU CAN FLY A HELICOPTER ?

I thought this was pretty cool...I played it for about 1o minutes or so and the furthest I got was 988, See what you can do and post your record distance.

http://www.hurtwood.demon.co.uk/Fun/copter.swf

 

Posted by ripend_turmoil @ 2:25 pm EDT | Permalink | 2 Comments

My New House...

I need to take more photos but here are 2 pics of my new house...I will have more to follow.

It was built about 11 months ago. I know the photo quality isnt so hot but I took these from mycamera phone...better photos soon to follow.http://i157.photobucket.com/albums/t46/turmoil33/IMG00021.jpg

http://i157.photobucket.com/albums/t46/turmoil33/IMG00020.jpg

Posted by ripend_turmoil @ 1:59 pm EDT | Permalink | 14 Comments

My NEW House...

I need to take more photos but here are 2 pics of my new house...I will have more to follow.

It was built about 11 months ago. well hell, I am an utter and complete dumbass cause I cant get the photos up...help

Posted by ripend_turmoil @ 10:42 am EDT | Permalink | 5 Comments